Thirteen weeks / Week 1
The 90-Day Rebuild
Week 1: Starting measure
If tonight is still the first night, stop. This is the wrong week. Run the First 24 Hours. Do not run this sheet on the night she left.
Hire counsel in your jurisdiction before you sign, move, or agree to anything lasting.
Book pointer
Follow the book's order. Do not invent a second sequence. This week sits at the turn from Part One into Part Two.
- Part One, The Wake-Up Call. Look at the marriage without fooling yourself. Why the moves you want tonight make it worse.
- Part Two, The 90-Day Protocol. The starting measure, then the open of days 1-30.
Open Chapter 5, Measuring Your Starting Point. Then Chapter 6, days 1-30. Read those. Do not paste them here.
Do not open Part Three this week. Do not read interest. Do not plan a first meeting.
This week is not therapy. Not legal advice. Not a promise she returns.
This week does three things
1. Score: the starting measure
Write the man as he is today. Not the man you will describe to her.
Three baselines. One line each. Numbers you can take again in week 4, week 6, and week 12.
- Body. One number you can re-measure without a story. Sleep hour, training days you already do, or a walk you can count. Not a fantasy program.
- Work. One number. Days you will be at the job, or one deliverable you can finish without announcing it.
- Word. One sentence you will keep. This week that sentence is the restraint below.
This is the course starting measure. It is not a copy of the book's assessment appendix. Do not import a long instrument into this sheet. Do not invent a cut score.
Circle one of the three as this week's metric. One. Not all three as a personality overhaul.
2. One restraint, not a speech
Days 1-30 open on restraint, not on a state-of-the-marriage talk.
Do not send the long message. Do not send the second message that explains the first. Do not show up with flowers and a growth speech.
If a short line about the marriage has not been said, and a line is required, use the book's short line, once, from the pages you just read. Then stop. This page does not reprint that line.
If kids, money, or the lawyer need a fact, send the fact. Times. Addresses. Amounts. Who has Wednesday. Do not tack the marriage onto the pickup.
If there are papers, do not handle them with a vibe. Counsel in your jurisdiction. This page will not draft a filing.
The one conversation this week may be the restraint itself: you do not start a new one. If you need to talk, talk to the trusted man from week 0, or to counsel, not to her about us.
Distance is logistics. It is not a vanishing act. It is not a thirty-day spell to make her miss you. It is not dread.
3. One body, work, or word metric
The one you circled. Name the count before Monday.
- Body: walk or train on four days. Or lights out at a set hour on five nights.
- Work: five days at the work that pays you. Or one finished thing you already owed.
- Word: zero marriage messages to her. Logistics only if those lines exist.
Write the number you promised and the number you did. That is the metric.
Worksheet
Date the page. Keep it.
| Line | This week | Notes |
|---|---|---|
| Conversation or restraint | One sentence used, or none, and none needed. | |
| Body / work / word metric | promised ___ / done ___ | One metric only. |
| Week score (0-10) | Did you do the week you named. | |
| Her return | not scored | Byproduct. Off the sheet. |
Do not
Do not chase. Do not punish her with silence. Do not manufacture jealousy.
Do not sign. Do not move the household. Do not agree to anything lasting without counsel.
Do not start Part Three because you are lonely.
Do not drink the restraint off the phone.
Do not treat this week as therapy, legal advice, or a reunion plan.
Close
You have a baseline, one restraint, one number.
Week 2 is the same shape inside days 1-30. Do not raise the difficulty by adding a campaign.